Watch out Mickey, there's a new theme park on the block

It will come as no surprise to most people that North Korean dictator Kim-Jong Un is away with the fairies, however reports suggest he wants to bring the country along with him. The Rodong Sinmun the newspaper of North Korea's ruling party calls for the people to "Spruce up" their country turning it into a "Socialist Fairyland".

Kim Jong-un has seemingly become disillusioned by his countries lack of theme parks and decided to turn the whole country into one. He has instructed for all the nations roundabouts to be measured up for spinning teacup rides and the rail network is to become one giant roller coaster.

Despite not travelling more than 30 mph, being mostly flat and feeling very communist, the ‘roller coaster’ rail network will offer the chance to experience the vast expanse of North Korean darkness, with every journey offering the thrill of “an equal chance of a derailment, collision or plunging into a ravine.”

Can fairies see in the dark?

Some analysts suggest the move away from the traditional strong dictatorship to promote the equality of communism is an attempt to increase tourist numbers, bringing in revenue to feed their starving population. However, cynics suggest it will simply finance their next batch of cardboard tanks and that U.N weapons inspectors will likely end their visit sick from candyfloss and entombed in a rusty train wreck at the base of a cliff.